ABOUT ONCE A YEAR I POST A FEW THOUGHTS AND OPINIONS ON GETTING QUICKLY, HAPPILY & SAFELY FROM POINT A TO POINT B WHEN TRAVELING HERE, THERE & EVERYWHERE. THESE THOUGHTS & OPINIONS ARE BASED ON YEARS OF EXPERIENCE DRIVING WAY TOO FAST AND GETTING IN TROUBLE WITH VARIOUS WELL-MEANING LECTURERS & TICKET WRITERS! LOL!
Even if you think we have gone completely Orwellian, and you may be right, just read on for some critical thoughts on traveling around our planet.
Some days when I read or listen to the news from our new, ever connected, social media driven, X enlarged, Instagrammed, and Facebooked world of constant, yet vapid, sources that tell us about our ever-shrinking world, I wonder where it all will end. If you are a cynic, you believe George Orwell was spot on - "Big Brother is Watching You - 1984" - he just missed it by a few years.
I mean, a recent survey showing that ten percent of 1,000 college graduates polled believe Judge Judy is on the Supreme Court is NOT funny. We live in an increasingly banal world influenced by too many empty suits (All Politicians) and the famously unaccomplished (The Kardashians). Marshall McLuhan's admonishment "the medium is the message" is now officially on warp speed. We scratch our heads and ask, and ask and ask - What in the bloody hell is going on? And we get few answers from the institutions that we grew up believing in.
Humor is the Life Saver
After Extensive Research of people much smarter or at least more famous than me I have found some thoughts by famous and not-so famous travelers and wanderers that will give all vagabonds some needed levity as they fly, ride or drive around this planet of diverse souls with different and often unique life experiences.
1) Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason - Jerry Seinfeld.
2) When preparing to travel, lay out all your clothes and all your money. Then take half the clothes and twice the money - Susan Heller Anderson.
3) I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train - Oscar Wilde.
4) On a New York subway you can get fined for spitting, but you can throw up for nothing – Lewis Gizzard.
5) When you come to a fork in the road, take it - Yogi Berra.
6) Be advised that there is no parking in Europe - Dave Barry.
7) I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.” –Mark Twain
8) My parents complain I travel too much. I mean, I could be a drug addict, do they realize how lucky they are? - Unknown
9) The only way to explain how some people dress for the airport is they think no one else will be there – Andy Borowitz
10) Airline travel is hours of boredom interrupted by moments of stark terror - Al Bolisk
11) You want to know what it’s like to be on a plane for 22 hours? Sit in a chair, squeeze your head as hard as you can, don’t stop, then take a paper bag and put it over your mouth and nose and breathe your own air over and over and over – Lewis Black.
12) The man who goes alone can start today, but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready – Henry David Thoreau.
13) If you don’t have a stupid travel story to tell, you did something terribly wrong! - Unknown.
14) Our happiest moments as tourists always seem to come when we stumble upon one thing while in pursuit of something else – Lawrence Block.
15) Do you ever stress about money and then book another flight? - Unknown.
16) I wish travel therapy was covered by my health insurance - Unknown
17) Work tip: Stand up. Stretch. Take a walk. Go to the airport. Get on a plane. Never return - Unknown.
18) The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page - Saint Augustine.
19) Don't speak the language. Already said 3 times "what". Now just smile and nod and hope for the best - Unknown.
20) I always know how much fun we had on a trip based on how many U-turns we made while looking for our hotel - Susie Stafford.
Two videos today that should make you laugh!
1) Grammy Winner Lewis Black on touring Canada.
2) Grammy nominated Nate Bargatze on trying to check-in for a DELTA flight!
D.L.Stafford
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